April 18, 2014

Advice : Am losing everything 'What should i do?

I used to work for an adverting firm years back until God blessed me with my own firm and things were going on very fine, I rented an office space and later moved to my own building. Am the major distributor for one of the leading Electronics in the World. I got married 15 years ago and am blessed with two lovely kids. I loved my wife and provided her with everything she wanted, a flourishing business, cars, love, sex, name it.
Few years into our marriage, I notice so many changes in her and I couldn’t just understand what was going on. Then one day her phone rang and I picked it, Hey love, came a male voice and I responded Hello, the line went dead immediately.
In my confused state I decided to check her phones to see who called. I was so shocked when I saw messages like, I love you pie! Thanks for the money! Hope we can do it again, and this time I’ll be on top, Please pie wear the peach pant on Sunday. My brother, I saw all manner of message I can’t tell you, my heart broke and I felt I was in hell. So my wife is cheating and will still pretend to me, like am the only man she loves.
Meanwhile my kind of work had to do with mostly women and they was this particular girl who always wanted me, she was just 18 then and I was 40, I never saw anything special about her, so I always ignored and never wanted to see her. Then one day, she walked into my office and believe me she looked just like everything I wanted in a woman. I felt helplessly in love with her and that was the beginning of our journey to true love, “So I thought”.
She was like the wife I never had, always supporting every decision I made. She advised I opened more business so both of us can manage which I did in her name. we started travelling to Dubai to get stuffs to sell in Nigeria and its was selling, put her in school did everything she wanted. She even told me that my wife was a witch and oh God how I believed her, I guess it’s because I told her about my wife and all her deeds.
Doctor, I was too happy with her, at a point she fights with any female friend she saw at my office, on the road in the car, anywhere and I never saw anything wrong with it. She was in Abuja and I in Lagos but she made sure I paid her ticket to and fro to Lagos every weekend so she could monitor me, because according to her I was too good and people mostly ladies took advantage of that. She deleted every female name on phone, which I had to derive another means of storing their names. But I still saw nothing wrong with it.
I had this female friend who I told everything, and when I told her about Bola (that is her name) on phone she was so angry with me about it. She said I was charmed, well that didn’t bother me because love was all there. I even argued that she was God sent because her mum is a minister of God and she keep telling me she is my wife but my friend keep telling it’s a lie because no minister of God will tell me another woman is my wife when am married. My brother, it was not a small fight o. Bola finally blocked out all my friends and families from me, I’ll have to hide when calling my friends or family members. This went on for over ten years and in this year we were not married, each time I asked we should make it legal she will say she not ready, she needs some time, she want to finish school and all manner of excuses. Her mum kept telling me to be patient with her that she will come around.
I was still waiting patiently, rented an apartment and we moved in, she insisted that her daughter bears my name (she is not mine, but for another man). So they both became my full responsibilities including her family member. They call me to take them anywhere they were going; in short she was in charge of my life. I have completely forgotten about my wife, and have not made love to her while with Bola, only my kids I still checked on once in a while. Then suddenly she changed completely, told me we were not compatible anymore.

To cut the long story short my life have being messed up and am in a confused state as I write this. Am still thinking how it all happened, my wife, kids and Bola, Did my wife really deserve being abandoned by me, thou I have moved out of the rented apartment with Bola back to my home, but I still find it very difficult to move on with my wife. I have not touched her since I went back home. Please help me out.

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